12.03.2009

Gumption

Day 56:

Today has been a weird mental day.

Somewhere along the line it seems like I’ve lost motivation…to do anything.
I’ve completed tasks today, sure. But I have not done so because I’ve been motivated to do so, I’ve just done them.

Even now, I’m lacking the desire to toss out these thoughts.

I guess if I were to sum it up, well, it’s like I’m mentally detached…like I’ve lost interest. Rereading what I’ve put down sounds depressing, which is strange because I do not feel sad. In fact, I’m not sure that I’m feeling anything about this state, but I do know I’m lacking the desire to think, produce, or inspire.

This is not the me I know.

A former student commented to me today that I was more ‘fun’ last year. I’m not entirely sure what she meant, yet I can’t help but agree.

Where am I?

Today I’m learning that I need to learn how to motivate myself.

I hope tomorrow I learn that today was nothing more than a temporary funk.

2 comments:

  1. i know i said that,
    but that doesnt mean your not fun anymore.
    sorry if i made you think that
    you still inspire me=]

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  2. Tou have always been fun :] but i guess today you just felt like you realized the things that wernt that happyful. You will recooperate, my whole week sucked I didnt feel like myself at all either. I had like 4 tests in one day, a science project , and a LOT of hw. Sometimes there are reasons why you dont feel yourself and sometimes there arent, but youll be okay soon. I hope i will too.

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